Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
