Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
BRING THE BAGELS
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
