the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
