NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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