he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize