He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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