Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize