ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
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