The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Two words: nipple clamps
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