dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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