just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
