I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
