No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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