Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Randomize
