Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
