So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
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