We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
