Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Houston, we have a blender
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
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