So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
