I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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