I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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