Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
