Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You are the jesus of drinking
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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