I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
