K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
