That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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