The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
