shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
one two three fourrrrnication!
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
