It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
