That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
