hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
