Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
