they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Randomize
