And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize