Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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