What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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