There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
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Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
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I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
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