I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
