i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
