Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
How does it feel to date your dad?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
