Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
