is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
