How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
