Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize