No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
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Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
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I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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