after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Randomize
