I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize