drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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