Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(708): View more from Illinois

oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(708): oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you http://tfl.nu/ee4s

Replies (11) Good night (1622) Bad night (3013)
Favorite
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(610): then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer. http://tfl.nu/jb6y

Replies (21) Good night (1252) Bad night (4018)
Favorite
(631): View more from New York

I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.

(1-631): View more from New York

I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(631): I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified. (1-631): I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes. http://tfl.nu/l5ui

Replies (50) Good night (7436) Bad night (2074)
Favorite
(254): View more from Texas

just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(254): just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night. http://tfl.nu/wct2

Replies (37) Good night (5470) Bad night (1180)
Favorite
(905): View more from Toronto

Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(905): Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine. http://tfl.nu/hm69

Replies (12) Good night (1348) Bad night (4114)
Favorite
(860): View more from Connecticut

i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(860): i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle http://tfl.nu/gxwa

Replies (24) Good night (1529) Bad night (5714)
Favorite
(408): View more from California

Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(408): Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this http://tfl.nu/4kx4

Replies (16) Good night (5198) Bad night (1028)
Favorite
(609): View more from New Jersey

That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(609): That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me. http://tfl.nu/oade

Replies (4) Good night (1040) Bad night (3563)
Favorite
(540): View more from Virginia

I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(540): I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica http://tfl.nu/lleg

Replies (2) Good night (2020) Bad night (588)
Favorite
(919): View more from North Carolina

Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(919): Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week http://tfl.nu/ejf9

Replies (3) Good night (945) Bad night (961)
Favorite
(856): View more from New Jersey

I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(856): I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police? http://tfl.nu/pr1m

Replies (5) Good night (1228) Bad night (875)
Favorite
(336): View more from North Carolina

Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(336): Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question http://tfl.nu/9vj8

Replies (12) Good night (1596) Bad night (480)
Favorite
(919): View more from North Carolina

I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(919): I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on http://tfl.nu/gqy6

Replies (3) Good night (439) Bad night (464)
Favorite
(901): View more from Tennessee

I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(901): I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history http://tfl.nu/g93r

Replies (2) Good night (387) Bad night (189)
Favorite
(512): View more from Texas

The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(512): The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen http://tfl.nu/mpbb

Replies (2) Good night (145) Bad night (298)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard