this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
